I have been home one week now, and I have to be honest, I feel a bit out of place in my own home, even in my own skin. I’m not quite sure what to do with myself.
Please don’t get me wrong.
I adore my husband and children and was so anxious to see their familiar faces again and hold them and be mom and wife.
Without a doubt they are my calling.
But I kind of miss Guatemala.
Actually, I really miss it.
In her book, Kisses from Katie, Katie Davis describes her joy in returning to Uganda after a time of fundraising in America (read her whole story here). She spent the initial weeks home after her return loving on her daughters and traveling into the six villages served by Amazima, the ministry she heads in Uganda. She describes it this way:
“Visiting the villages is always pure joy for me. I relish being surrounded by the raw human need that seems to be on display everywhere, a true reminder of our immense need for a God and Savior. I stand in awe of the gratitude and happiness people express over their simple lives. Their neediness keeps them so dependent on God, and among them, I always feel so very close to His heart.”
I think that’s what I miss. That raw human need that brought me so near to Jesus. The simplicity. The desperation. The dependence.
How ironic that as Americans, in general, we spend most of our lives building security and safety to ensure happiness, when it seems the people with the greatest joy have next to nothing by our Western standards.
Only in heaven will we see how much we owe to the poor for helping us to love God better because of them. – Mother Theresa
I had the privilege of traveling last week with Noel Yeatts, World Help Vice President. In her book Awake, she puts to words what I am experiencing this first week back home:
“People talk about culture shock. I have never experienced that when going on such trips, but I always experience it coming home. It is called “reentry.” “Over there” things are simple and clear. The needs are great and at times overwhelming, but the big, hard questions become easy to answer. What is crucial in life- what matters and what doesn’t- becomes clear when you deal with life and death issues.”